Being a recovering addict, there are still times when I have what I call “drug dreams.” It’s when the old man comes back to life and does all the things that my new nature rails against while I sleep. I haven’t had one of those in quite a while, and an hour after waking up today, I still have strong negative emotions from the nightmare I had last night.

I believe God is using today’s passages to minister into that place.

Scripture

John 1:14-18 New Living Translation (NLT)

14 So the Word became human and made his home among us. He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the glory of the Father’s one and only Son.

15 John testified about him when he shouted to the crowds, “This is the one I was talking about when I said, ‘Someone is coming after me who is far greater than I am, for he existed long before me.’”

16 From his abundance, we have all received one gracious blessing after another. 17 For the law was given through Moses, but God’s unfailing love and faithfulness came through Jesus Christ. 18 No one has ever seen God. But the unique One, who is himself God, is near to the Father’s heart. He has revealed God to us.

Observation

• Jesus is God and lived among us
• Jesus is full of Grace, unfailing love and faithfulness
• From His abundance, we all receive blessing upon blessing
• Moses brought The Law – Jesus brought unfailing love and faithfulness
• God is unseen, but Jesus is our revelation of God Himself

Application

• Jesus is God and lived among us – this is truly beyond human comprehension. How can anyone truly believe that to be true? Do I? The very foundation of Step Two of 12-step recovery work is “Came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity.” Without a comprehensive belief that Jesus is God and it is HIM who will restore my sanity (put the old man to death, rescue me from my sin nature), then we would be left secretly hopeless. Do I believe Jesus is God?
• Unfailing love and faithfulness stand in stark contrast to my dysfunctional childhood experiences of abuse and VERY conditional love. How difficult is it for me to fully trust God and believe He isn’t just waiting for me to fail (like I always do) so He can punish me? With as much awareness as I have in this area, you’d think to trust in God’s unfailing love would come easy, but deep down, in places where nightmares come from, do I really see myself through His eyes?
• I have been blessed over and over – yet how much gratitude do I experience or express in my times of worship? Do I have any entitlements thinking I deserve a better or more comfortable life?
• God can seem so far off and mysterious, yet by getting to know Jesus through the study of His life and words, I can know God.

Prayer

Lord, I thank you that you allow me to remember where I come from. This journey of redemption, of sanctification, is a difficult one, but I will be grateful for it all as it keeps me humble. As if life outside weren’t hard enough, the demons from my past continue to remind me who I was and claim it is still who I am. But as you said to Paul, Your grace is sufficient. I repent of my weak gratitude that has a tendency to whine about life or how hard recovery is when clearly it is Your grace and unfailing love that has rescued me is rescuing me and promises to forever rescue me. I repent of my self-condemnation and fear, and of my thinking that You are anything less than my Sovereign and all-powerful Savior who is filled with nothing more than unfailing love for me. Thank you, Jesus! 

I’d love to hear about your personal observations, applications or prayers regarding this specific passage, c’mon and join the conversation.

Blessings in Christ,

George