John 14:15

 “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments

When we first come to Christ, He draws us in so incredibly deep by constantly and consistently expressing what only He can…

Unconditional Love

Mercy

Grace

Compassion

Healing

Romans 5:8
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

John 3:16
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

My completely invalid estimation is that 1/3 of the bible is about how much God loves us and what He does for us

Another 1/3 is about what happens to those who reject Him.

And another 1/3 is the kicker…. the promises wrapped around the word IF

If you’ve followed any of my previous writings you’d know that I am forever struck by the intense magnitude of that word. It calls for actions, it begs for a response to what His life and death and resurrection purchased for us.

Free will is the perfect acid test, we can choose to obey, to respond, to step up and step in to Kingdom Works or we can reject all that He has ordained from before time began.

As my heart continues to break open over my sin nature and those times of isolation, fear, pride or control step in to run the show I find myself so incredibly convicted by that darn word… IF

Deuteronomy 11:13
“It shall come about, if you listen obediently to my commandments which I am commanding you today, to love the Lord your God and to serve Him with all your heart and all your sou

John 13:35
By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”

John 15:10
If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love.

Deuteronomy 11:26-27a
See, I am setting before you today a blessing and a curse— 27 the blessing if you obey the commands of the Lord your God that I am giving you today; 28 the curse if you disobey the commands of the Lord your God…

The glory of the cross is that His grace is sufficient, His blood covers the transgressions, but only for those under the New Covenant who call on Christ’s redemption and not rely on their own power, own understanding, own plans, own desires… oh that I could thrive under this covering and not continue to feel scared, vulnerable and weak if I’m not in control. I don’t know any other way….

For years I have felt the angst of the Apostle Paul’s words – I do what I don’t want to do and don’t do what I should. Today however I feel like I’ve been hiding behind that for the truth is I do exactly what I want to do and don’t do what I don’t want to do.

I’m a sinner and my only hope is the Cross. My life is poured into a 1/2 dozen different ministries and I believe it is fruit bearing, but yet I still feel so at risk of hearing those words “I never knew you” because the word IF keeps me awake at night.

How are you doing with the “if’s” in your life?

Lord as much as I ache over my sin, I don’t run from it. As much as I claim to love you and love serving you I sense the undercurrent of pride and ego being fed by the fruit you bear. I fear Lord that I have fallen into the trap of replacing my old life of lust for porn into a lust for the Spirit, that You would make me “feel” high. I fear Lord that although You brought me to you nearly 5 years ago and transformed my life that somehow I’ve just shuffled you into the mix of my self-serving striving for worth and acceptance. I believe it is possible Lord that your heart is not broken over my sin in the same manner that mine may be, but instead your heart is broken because I still don’t realize that your Love does not come with a penalty as the broken love I had as a child did. Help me Father get off the train of earning affections, help me to find peace by letting go and truly letting Your will be mine, to rest in you Lord, I yearn for rest. In the precious name of Jesus who paid it all…